Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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