No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
