I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Actions speak louder than pants.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
my god I love twenty year old dicks
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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