Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Randomize
