I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
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