It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
