I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
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