weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
