Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
