No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize