I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
