My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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