Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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