Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
