Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
We just shotgunned beers for America
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
