no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
