How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
