It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I would fuck him just for his dog
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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