i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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