note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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