Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize