oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
The adults are the big ones right?
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
