i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
