So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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