I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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