We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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