3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
