Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
