Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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