you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
