I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Randomize
