pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
