D3 body, D1 cock
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
