I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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