Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
