based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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