Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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