I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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