its not stalking. its research.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
