I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
