I wanna bring you to show and tell
We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
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