I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize