so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
