girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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