If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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