my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
i used baking grease as lip gloss
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
the room spins SO much faster in panama
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize