tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
It's rum buckets o'clock
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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