do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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