I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
