We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Why is there bacon in the couch?
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
